Kayode Ojewale
Mon, Jun 19, 2023 1:04 PM

The significance of a father’s influence, By Kayode Ojewale

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The significance of a father’s influence, By Kayode Ojewale
Indeed, a father forms an important pillar in the development of child’s emotion...

Indeed, a father forms an important pillar in the development of child’s emotional and physical well-being

Good fathering is an investment that will not only benefit the family but the society at large

The returns from a well fathered life are enormous because such life has been prepared for challenges ahead

Irresponsible fathers could be relegated to mere sperm donors but responsible fathers are the bedrock of the family

“I believe that what we become depends on what our fathers teach us at odd moments, when they aren’t trying to teach us

We are formed by little scraps of wisdom.” – Umberto Eco (1932-2016), Italian medievalist and philosopher Little or no attention is usually paid to the commemoration of Father’s Day, which comes up on the third Sunday in June every year

The reason is not farfetched – the roles of fathers in the life of a child and in the society at large are underestimated

Most people assume that all what is expected of a father in a family is to cater for the needs of everyone

No

This is completely untrue

In most studied cultures, fathers are assumed to play only the role of provider

Whereas, a true father plays two other roles apart from that – the protector and disciplinarian

It is not to say that mothers are not functional in these regard but the fathers are usually noted for these roles

Let it be noted that mothers could also do as much as the fathers in the stated roles

Fatherhood isn’t just a mere status that one attains, it comes with responsibilities, obligations and selfless sacrifices

Parenting as a father is characterised by sacrificial duties

Sacrifice becomes an integral phase of a father’s life

To a good father, his personal life needs to take the backseat while those of the child(ren) take the front seat

A perfect epitome of a responsible life is that of a good father

The paternal bond between a father and his child(ren) demands that the father provides unflinching care and constant sacrifices

A father is not just a male who begets a child, there is more to who a father is in the life of everyone

A father is not just the male parent of a child, he is the mentor of that child

He coaches his child in a manner that leaves indelible marks in the mind of that child

The child looks up to his father to provide a feeling of security and confidence

A father talks less and acts more

He leads the way by acting what he professes

He may not always declare his love for the family all the time but he shows it always

Not every good man is a good father, but every good father passes for a good man

A good father in this context means a man who displays the desirable characters for his children

A responsible father constantly reminds his children of the consequences of their actions later in life, as he disciplines them calmly and lovingly

Whether the children realises this or not, good fathers are role models to their children

We cannot overemphasise the role a paternal presence plays in the life of children, as a father’s impacts outlive their existence

A research once revealed that people with actively involved father figures in their lives during childhood are more likely to have strong lasting marriages

People without father figures in their lives may likely have difficulties in having influential role models and developing some true life values

A child from a father-absent home may have trouble with his academics and eventually drop out from school

Father figures here refer to the biological, adoptive, or step-father

A father builds and leaves legacies

He wears himself out to enrich the children in wisdom and knowledge

This portrays the teaching skill that nature bestows on fathers

It is the father-effect a child has that determines how well his father impacted him

One cannot underestimate the involvement of a father in the cognitive skills development of a child in his early and middle ages

At these stages of life, the child builds, with the assistance and guidance of the father, the skills that will help him perform tasks associated with judgment, intuition, perception, awareness and reasoning

The father can only achieve these tasks with the child via availability, accessibility, engagement and involvement

A father is the first teacher who gives his growing child an insight into the world of men

He is the first to instruct the child with directives and order

He shares with the child life-lessons in simple and understandable ways

A child grows to learn at his father’s feet

Indeed, a father forms an important pillar in the development of child’s emotional and physical well-being

Good fathering is an investment that will not only benefit the family but the society at large

The returns from a well fathered life are enormous because such life has been prepared for challenges ahead

Irresponsible fathers could be relegated to mere sperm donors but responsible fathers are the bedrock of the family

It may then be safe to say that a fathered life is a better life

In all, good parenting will shape the life of a child and launch him on the right track to live a life of his own

What a child sees his parents do strongly steers him into adulthood, so the onus lies on the parents, not just on the father alone

Good fathers deserve to be commended and celebrated for all that they do for their families

This piece is dedicated to all fathers who are still around and alive out there, to the waiting and potential ones and lastly, to those who are no more

Kayode Ojewale, of the Public Affairs and Enlightenment Department of LASTMA, writes via [email protected].

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